Holy Shit, this is real!

At 4 this morning I peed on a stick … and to my utmost disbelief, a second line appeared.

I guess I shouldn’t be TOO surprised–this was the goal of removing the IUD right after the honeymoon last month, after all–and I’ve been feeling sort of off for a few days: nausea, mood swings, dizziness … but I just wasn’t expecting it to happen so quickly!

I’d told Ben on Thursday night, 4 days ago, that I was late. We talked about the fact that it could easily be my body readjusting to the lack of hormones–it’s been almost 3 years since my last period, so I guess “late” is an understatement. We decided not to get ahead of ourselves and to let things play out naturally.

My best friend, Kristen, visited that weekend, so I also let her know that I was feeling a bit funny … but neither of us wanted to get our hopes up. We’re both a bit dramatic (that’s the most diplomatic word choice) and have each been late before and developed crazy psycho-somatic pregnancy symptoms, totally freaking ourselves out. Hell, I did it last month on our honeymoon! I got sick (maybe from the food, maybe from drinking too much tequila) and it took me a few days to recover, so obviously my mind started to wander into the “What If” zone. It took a negative test and a doctor’s advice to get some Prilosec to finally convince me that it was food poisoning, not morning sickness.

But anyway, back to this morning. 4 am and I couldn’t sleep, and I had to pee, and my mind was going a mile a minute, so I decided it was time.

And slowly but surely, the second line appeared … faint at first, but becoming darker as I watched. Amazing. Awe-inspiring. Terrifying. I just sat and stared at the stick, my hands trembling slightly, my mind simultaneously spinning and thinking nothing at all.

I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep, so I went downstairs and started doing some research on how to teach yoga while pregnant. I mean, life goes on, and I had a class to teach in 10 hours and had no idea how to modify. At work I could disguise my symptoms–at least I hoped I could–but when it comes to teaching people to do something that could endanger my health, I wanted to have all the answers.

At 6am, when I knew Ben’s alarm was about to go off, I went back upstairs and waited for him to wake up. (I’m sure there will be many more nights in our future when I’m awake and he’s not, but it didn’t seem fair to wake him up at 4 just because I was going nuts with excitement.) I whispered, “Guess what? I’m pregnant!” and suddenly he was hugging me and kissing my head and beaming from ear to ear.

And then we had our first chat with our puppy, Toby, about how his life was going to change when the “Human Puppy” came in November. About 10 minutes later, Ben said, “Do you think it’s odd that we’ve used the phrase Human Puppy more often than the word baby?” And I thought for a minute and replied, “It would seem strange to an outsider, but it seems perfectly natural to us so let’s just run with it.” Which I think might be a good parenting style, come to think of it.

After powering through work and  yoga (less twists than usual, and no work on the belly tonight), feeling nauseous the entire time, and I walked in the door to something beautiful:
My thoughtful husband, holding this bag filled with pregnancy goodies:

hello baby bag

  • Saltines and ginger ale, to ward off the nausea
  • A copy of What to Expect when You’re Expecting, “because that’s the book you get, right?”
  • A book of baby names that he’d already started going through and choosing favorites (he got as far as Abrielle)
  • Pickles, just in case my lifelong disgust for them suddenly turned into a craving
  • A get well soon card written from Mom to Dad (he explained, “Oddly they didn’t have a card that says “Holy crap you’re knocked up and in 9 months we’re going to be parents!” so I had to make due)
  • Tucked inside the card: A voucher for a free car wash, because he’d had a few extra moments after baby shopping and wanted to share the wealth (always the pragmatist)
  • And finally, a Red Sox onesie … because that man truly knows the way to my heart.

I started this blog because — guess what? I can’t sleep again! But even more importantly, I want to be careful about telling friends and family–waiting until it’s safe and healthy to tell, then making sure that the VIPs know first. I know that in the meantime, I’ll be bursting at the seams to talk about this adventure. If you’ve read back to this point, I hope that means you’re excited for us too … and that you’ve already started sewing a hat for the little one because it will be very cold when s/he arrives in November in upstate NY. Let me know if you need our address to start shipping boxes of hand-me-downs!


  1. Andrea- says

    Well, sadly, it’s taken me a while to read your blog. But, I’ve been catching up at work—great way to pass the time! Sadly, I have no hand-me-downs for you…I’ll leave that to Bridget. But I have tons of super cute (Vintage)Gymboree clothes still in good shape from Emily….so when are you gonna have a girl?? :)

    • megcasebolt says

      Andrea – Thanks for the generous offer. We’ll start talking about a girl when you start talking about Baby #3. ;)

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